Regarding the Toilets in O'Hare

It's always alarming when you hear the F word yelled from the stall next to you in the Chicago airport. It was a moment for investigation.

I flushed my toilet and walked out to see if he had emerged. His stall door was open and he was looking in the toilet when he craned his head back toward me. Another alarming thing is realizing that you're staring at another man in a stall. He ended his confused/angry face by awkwardly smiling at me and saying this:

"I dropped my cell phone in the toilet."

My smile warranted him to go on as I watched him gingerly handle his dripping Blackberry.

"I thought these toilets were so freakin' weird; I had to take a picture of 'em to…" he sort of trailed off when I interrupted him with a generous laugh and an "Oh." He swore again to comfort himself.

The toilets at the O'Hare Airport in Chicago, IL are nothing entirely alien. They look like any other toilet, except for the fact that they have plastic wrapping around the seat which automatically changes out upon your entering of the stall. It's a somewhat uninspiring sanitation effort. I suppose the most fascinating thing about it all is that it does say "thank you" on the screen when you're done, but is that picture worthy?

"Sorry about that, man," I finally said.

"It's a business phone, I can get another. I just kind of need it for the road," he replied. We both let a silence hang in the air after he said that and then he broke it by saying, "Weird toilets though, right?"

"Yeah," I said.

I then had a strange urge to help him in some way, maybe give him my phone or something as I watched him take out the battery and rub it dry with his coat, a certainly sad sight. I want to give him some sort of assistance, but what can one do for a man who drops his cell phone in the toilet? I'm only one man...

I surrendered to the sinks and washed my hands. As I left, a tall man walked in to a stall next to the exit. I heard him chuckle to himself as the toilet made its rotation noise.

Not worth it, buddy.