BEST DAY EVER

Yesterday, I needed to head to Mike's Auto Parts on 52nd and Woodstock in order to purchase a new headlight for my sleek 1995 Honda Accord. Ali was with me, and because we were heading to 52nd and Woodstock around noon, I thought it would be a sin if we didn't stop by Otto's Sausage Kitchen and Meat Market for a hot dog, pepperoni stick, or some other delicious meat treat. Because of my passion for meat, and my ties to the place, we pulled off the side of the road and walked up to the barbeque where some wiener cookin' was happening.

I ordered, grabbed a bag of chips, and reached for my wallet.

The man cooking the wieners spoke a foreign language to me.

"I'm sorry?" I said with hesitation. I could have sworn he said something in English, but I kept trying to roll it around in my head and I couldn't get anything.

He spoke again, but I couldn't understand.

"I'm sorry, but come again?" I said for an embarrassing second time.

"This meal is on the house. The Food Network is here, so if you could just sit inside and smile, that will be of great help to us." After he said this he looked back at the wieners and focused.

I, obviously, stood in total shock.

Here's a little background, so as you can somewhat understand the state of shock I entered upon his statement: I worked for Otto's Sausage Kitchen and Meat Market for an entire year of my life, which gave me enough life material to write a useless book, but nonetheless a book. In my entire time as an employee there, it was made very clear to me that my free lunch, which I received every 8-hour + shift, was the greatest gift one could receive from the Otto legacy. I was told to appreciate it, and to never take this gift of free sausage for granted. Furthermore, during my time employed, I never (NEVER) once witnessed a customer getting anything for free. You dropped your wiener on the ground? Too bad, buy another one. Your pepperoni too dry? That's how it comes, you ungrateful punk. Is the smoked salmon too spicy? There was no such thing as smoked salmon when I was your age, you thoughtless tool.

These were the philosophies of Otto's. As you might imagine, I grew to appreciate, take care of, and love my free meals at the Meat Market.

Flash forward years later as I stand with Ali at the barbeque and I hear a foreign language, nay, a distant tongue, ancient of days!

"This one's on the house," he said as he held a floppy wiener in front of my face. The ancient dialect entered my brain and a flourish of feelings of gold rushed through my deluded mind. This. is. it.

Calmly, I took the wiener, grabbed my chips, and walked inside the shop to eat.

I sat down across from my beautiful lady, collected myself, and looked at her saying, "Best day ever." She smiled in agreement.